my girlfriend is dragging me down

Good Luck!! So he . Setup Type: Offline Installer / Full Standalone Setup. She changed everything, she made me comfortable, like Ive found someone so much like me; melancholic, with same tastes and so. There is this main problem with communication between boys and girls we think a little bit differently and act too. Here are 10 who are holding you down. When someone puts you down, deal with it by not immediately reacting to him. If, after years of treatment, she isnt getting any better, something probably needs to change. Like everything was depending on something else, like it was fragile structure. She struggles to make friends and has isolated herself from the world. my girlfriend has depression and is anorexic. i fell as if i cant help her, im not good enough to make her happy although i try so hard and its making me doubt myself more and more. She will text or call me out of blue and tell how much she appreciates my patience with her. Everything is my fault according to her. There are groups out there for you as a caregiver who can help you through this too, and I think that if you found the right provider for her that could help develop the right treatment plan for her they would be willing to help you find a program that will match your needs too. Offer to help her move large pieces of furniture and boxes to her new space. The reason Yt5s.io is the best youtube downloader . The fact that shes still hanging around him enforces that theyve cheated. On my side my family is going through a very rough time and were worried about losing our home, Im going through a quarter-life crises where I dont know what I studied is the right thing for me, Im also really worried about my future because I dont know where Im heading in life. Life is too short to waste time and energy on depressed people. And also you have to be a little tough, let her know that you understand and love (you can tell her that simply in words, she might not notice that your actions are supposed to tell it, it is also difference between sexes) her but dont be the hero here. Break up. I'm seeing shapes behind the curtain. I wanted to cope with it on my own, I thought that I would be finally feeling proud of myself if I could fix myself. Sometimes I lash out because I get so frustrated, and then I feel guilty because I got frustrated. I love her so much and wish I could take her pain away, but I feel ive lost myself and no longer feel happy. I really wish GoodTherapy.org would have some people, professionals or people who had past experiences in line with all the above comments and have them offer some advice and hope for everyone here. There are so many ways a relationship can be unhealthy, and therefore so many ways it can drag you down. So that he loves himself. So you see, these emotions are complicated, you have trace them few steps back to understand what is really going on. Since being in a relationship with her I feel like I've lost myself a little bit? If you haven't been feeling like yourself lately, your romance may be to blame. If you have depression or anxiety its because you know deep in your soul that you arent on the right path or living up to your potential. When the relationship isn't secure, however, you might feel this nagging sense of jealousy towards everything and everyone. "Unhealthy relationships can literally make you feel drained of energy. Medically reviewed by Jennifer Litner, PhD, LMFT, CST By Ash Fisher on June 10, 2021. I beat my depression, i became happy again but after a year with my gf and trying to care for her depression i can feel it creeping back again. Please keep in mind that GoodTherapy.org is an exclusive directory. Sign up and Get Listed. I have become very weary, weak and helpless toward her, every piece of support I give her is taken with offence, as an insult of her character or some other negative quam brewed inside her hyperactive mind. Shes fixates and ruminates on her health on a daily basis, and connects every ache and pain as a reflection of her perceived inability and shame around not taking care of herself, and thinks she cant trust her own mind. Listen, really try to listen like she was your best friend not girlfriend. I love her a lot, I just miss her old caring cuddly self! I was acting like it all was my boyfriends fault, and I sometimes felt like this. 11 months ago I started dating my girlfriend and everything was amazing. It works for me (I dont really have a hobby Im just at school all the time). I have a feeling I might just kill myself if this goes on. i feel it but i but i just cant deal with being her friend in school and more outside, i cant do it in school. Tristen, Armand, sounds like your girlfriends have real life boyfriends too. It is your life too. My gf & I have been dating for only five months. So both of you can benefit. "Healthy, happy relationships are where both partners meet each others' physical and emotional needs," says relationship etiquette expert Mara Opperman, in an interview with Bustle. Then she started talking that her family pressured her, about the meds and that she loved me, but had a really hard time. But I just dont know anymore. Smoking and drinking! He is also seeing a psychiatrist who has advised he doesnt work I am doing 3 jobs to pay for my divorce as he is going to go bankrupt with his business =- because he couldnt face going in to work except at lunch time. I have a battle on my hands, life has tried to tear me down before and I wont let it just yet..You choose to be happy, Woah that is one crazy situation both of you are dealing with. You have to start working on it, push things forward. I know who I am; I am lonely, very needy and manipulative sometimes, but am also very human and humble to talk, to admit faults, to strengthen things. When I have some me time to save my soul from drowning because of her, she said that I was selfish for leaving her for, like, a day! She wont go to counselling nor will she take medication, she hurts herself knowing that it hurts me because it means iv failed once again to make her happy. https://www.goodtherapy.org/find-therapist.html. I feel trapped. I don't have the same motivation and drive and care about myself like I did when I was single. We had a lot of fun together and while she did have some mental health issues, it never caused too many problems. Than it all started to fade, she had weekly outbursts after we met, we had a lovely weekend, then, the other day, she was always very depressed or even aggressive, treating herself very badly, being jealous on my friends, depreciating herself. I feel as much like a caretaker as I do a boyfriend. If you have trouble finding a professional in your area, dont be discouragedit may mean youll have better luck doing a Google search or asking for a referral from a trusted health professional, such as your doctor. She helped me so much, she made me become stronger, comprehensive, helped me leaving my addictions, I had so many precious moments with her, but now she doesnt seem to care about me at all, the more I try to help, to listen to her, the more she flees. I started to feel distant from her and that i dont want to be intimat to her. It may be time to step back and focus on yourself. please help! She losing her best friend to cancer and she going through crisis with weight loss. She might miss you. We do talk through alot of things and have a somewhat open dialogue, but I still feel resentful and angry when i feel shes not there for me, something i dont seem to get over, despite wanting to. Fact is the depression got better since he mey, I struggle with episodes now, not the full playlist, so to speak. Be willing to provide physical assistance. My girlfriend has been depressed for a number of years, unable to shake feelings of sadness and hopelessness that carry over into almost every aspect of our life together. It bothers me a lot and Ive done all I could to understand. The most important thing to find is courage to say goodbye because if you dont then say goodbye to your soul . I hope you found your way out and ability to stay out. Am I codependent? When you've had too much on your plate for a long time, behaviors in your partner that would normally be slightly irritating can feel like major disruptions to your peace of mind. Taking her depression into her own hands, can that make a person sick? He has put me last every time. All i see now is cold person who i love and so frustrated by the lack of intimacy. Still, its all your decision. Shawna Potter) Jim Ward. He would only talk and see me when he had nothing else to do but I was okay with that I was inlove with him. Step by step. Unfortunately, there seems to be nothing I can do when she feels down. All I got is she is just a drama queen, there wasnt any problems to become sad. At first I was stressed about it, but later I realised that my worrying wouldnt change the situation at all. She blames herself for everything, and says incredibly negative and hurtful things about her self. It Feels Like They Always Ask Too Much. If so, it could be that your relationship is wearing you out. They take all the goodness from you and leave you with nothing but sadness and depression. I fought with my boyfriend just to feel close to him for a while, to be able to talk. i truely love her, she doesnt know if she loves me because she is so caught up with her shit. Atlast I hate the word LOVE with cry. And do not try to help, just try to understand. I used to be able to help her cheer up and have a good time with her whenever she was sad but now,I cant do anything without getting an attitude from her or saying something stupid. Youve been shouldering a significant burden on your own for years; it sounds like you are ready to let someone help you carry the load. I always stopped everything to help her, to stay hours remind her how she is incredible. Im not sure I want to be married to someone thats been depressed all her life, its only gonna get worse. I dont see it getting any better. Before this everything was amazing, great relationship, we admitted to each other that we were in love and had fallen head over heals, amazing sex, I really felt like I had found my best friend. Even she could not continue her studies and quit her studies.Its all because of she loves me to core and missing me much! The GoodTherapy.org Team. Maybe she doesnt want to tell you how much she wants you to be with her because she doesnt want to appear needy. But enough about me, what I suggest youd do is get a hobby, or something to distract you from thinking about her all the time. "So, yes, your relationship problems could lead you to suffering from high blood pressure." Relationships are supposed to be about equality. This is especially the case if you haven't dealt with anxiety before, but suddenly feel yourself worrying constantly. In your head, you know it's no big deal. I cant leave her though because she said she wouldnt be able to live if i left her. DUMP THE SAD GIRL OTHERWISE SHE WILL DRAG YOU DOWN. Head up, somewhere we still exist and can grow back to be ourselves. It is not your role in this case. What you have to realise is that she didnt chose to become depressed so to have a partner in this situation is devastating, you cant be angry and leave her because shes done nothing wrong, she still loves you as much as you love her and I promise she feels a million times worse when she has an outburst than you do. The sad thing is when these ppl start showing their age and dont have their sh$t together. I take it this is detrimental to a persons feelings who has depression. I did every single thing that you guys have written here. Sam is just absolute right, Ive been with the same girlfriend for 8 years, helping her to cope with her anxiety and depression, which are not mild, in return I became a cranky, fearful and highly depressed individual, as soon as she moved in with me the symptoms became severe and everything was somehow my fault, even though we always lived under my expense (before at my parents, now at a house that i pay for literally everything) shes not willing to work or do anything, she always finds an excuse why something wont work out (she has a doctors degree, and she can do a lot of things with that particular degree she simply refuses to always citing some excuse about how its never going to work). Compatibility Mechanical: 64 Bit (x64) She doesnt get along with my family (or her own family for that matter) so cannot stay at my place (Im living with my family until I finish university). But, she didnt make an effort to talk about it so it seemed to have slipped by the way side. Im not sure whats going on but I let her know constructively that I considered leaving her I know its harsh but it was a reality check. ), it can really start to drag you down. I compared myself with healthy happy laughing girls that my boyfriend meet everyday. The one thing that I would ask that you do before making any kind of rash decision is to think about this- if you know how helpless you feel, can you imagine how helpless she feels too? This is important: I have to tell you you will not find the cure, you can be there and support but please stop believing that it will make the problem go away. (Yikes.). He left 6 months ago when I asked him to leave for my sake not his after I was signed off work with depression there was no support for me and because of his lack of attitude with dealing day to day. Once you enter your information, youll be directed to a list of therapists and counselors who meet your criteria. 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